From Upside-Down Kisses to Monkey Business: My Spidey Romance

I was a hormonal high schooler when the Tobey Maguire Spider-Man movies dropped in 2002, 2004, and 2007. Kirsten Dunst as the iconic MJ and Tobey as Spidey ruined romance for an entire generation of school-going kids. They made us so old-school when it came to love, now old-school romance is probably scared of us. The idea was clear: stick to one partner for the rest of your life, occasionally share an upside-down kiss, and swing around maniacally screaming "Help!" until your vigilante boyfriend scoops you up into the air. 

I loved Spidey. I wanted to marry him and make Spidey babies with him—a thought I planted in the head of my 21-year-old boyfriend (who later became my husband) as soon as I met him. He was quieter than me—but then again, anyone is quieter than me. That's not the point, though. The point is, he just smiled and nodded. 

I didn't marry Spider-Man, but I married someone who believed in the same Spidey principles of living life on the edge, being spontaneous, and sticking to one partner for life. Sigh! No wonder I'm lonely in very brief moments. After my big, fat, fantastic Spidey romance, I am left with a child who is definitely not a Spidey baby. Instead, this is a creature that looks human but behaves like a chimpanzee from the deep, dark rainforests of the Amazon. Many more sighs now. 

In hindsight, I suppose I did live out a fulfilling Spidey romance—what a pity that it was so short-lived! But I'm sure life has many more adventures in store for me and my mini-chimpanzee, if not a mini-Spidey. We continue swinging from one adventure to the next and we don't look down! 

Spidey-obsessed mommy, out!